I was supposed to put this post up yesterday, forgive me.
It's a Wednesday night, I'm hurdled at the edge of my bed with a box of chocolate wafers, four Oprah magazines and I'm listening to Adele. Yeah, yeah, I'm feeling mushy and gooey....bleurgh! Moving on, today is exactly a week since i stopped working and it has been a really boring week, 24 magazines down, five or six series and a couple of movies watched. I thought it would be a December full of partying but its turning out to be a lame ass one. Wait, i have a road trip next weekend, that counts for something right? Yaay! :]
I sleep half the day, partly because i'm sleepy and partly because i'm lazy, makes the days seem shorter too. In my defense though i've been sleeping really late, around 2 or 3am watching movies. I'm still trying to figure out the gist(I know this word courtesy of my bestie)*ahem* Oh, the gist of this post is New Year's Resolutions. Don't give me that look, I know you have already prepared one ama you were thinking of one. Its become kinda customary yeah, and same goes to not fulfilling them.
While you are at it, here are a couple of fashion faux pas you should not bring into 2012...
1. Popped collars
At some point in the early-to-mid-aughts, everyone decided that they wanted to look like that character James Spader played in every '80s movie he was in. You know, the douchey one in the tiny white running shorts who popped the collar on his pastel colored polo shirt? Remember when people started layering polo shirts of different colors and popping all the collars so that they would look like peacocks or something? So stupid. Unless it is raining, turn your effing collar down because you look like a goddamn date rapist. (And this is where I would shake my cane at the youths.
2. The return of Day-Glo
I remember hearing someone say at some point, "Orange is the new pink." Oh, really? WE DON'T NEED A NEW PINK BECAUSE WE ALREADY HAVE PINK. I want to blame Kanye West for this one, but it was a collective effort. Day-glo wasn't cool in the '80s and it didn't get cool just now. Unless you are going hunting, there is no reason to wear a shirt that hurts my eyes.
3. Fake Louis Vuitton purses/bags.
I'm sorry to any reader who may own/have owned one, but I am done seeing fake Louis Vuitton purses everywhere i turn especially the one in that leather pattern are fugly. Personally, I would rather my purse said, "I have good taste in colors/patterns" than "I spent too much on this fugly fake purse." I guess the plus-side of having a really ugly brown-on-tan purse is that when your stupid pink pugamuffin poops in your bag, no one will be able to tell. :p
4. Fedoras
Justin Timberlake looks good in these. Don Draper? Sure. You, me or your friend from campus who is trying to cover up the fact that he is going bald? Not so much. They just make you look like you're trying too hard. Fedoras: unless you are wearing a gray flannel suit and drinking whiskey or smoking a cigar, they are never a good idea.
5.Bunny ears?!
Introduced by Louis Vuitton, big bunny ears were the rage in 2010 and please leave them where they belong. This is where fashion walks a thin and dangerous line, fashion bordering on dress up party costume.
6.Ripped jeans.
Okay, a small tear or two is fine, but what i've been seeing on the streets, well you might as well not even be wearing pants. WHY purchase a pair of jeans, so abusively attacked with a craft knife, when you can do that yourself in 2 minutes flat?? Threads so mutilated, their barely hanging on are back,and worse than ever this ripped jeans trend, is constantly in and out of fashion, for reasons which i cannot understand! Sometimes, this trend works, but there's something ridiculous about the extreme cases of mutilated jeans..They give the impression that the slashes are for venting, but why wouldn't you just wear shorts or a skirt if it was a hot day?!
7. Jumpsuits.
The only people whom should be wearing jumpsuits, are infants. The main reason being that, very seldom is the jumpsuit flattering on anyone!
I have seen grown women wearing full jumpsuits that are apparently 'fashionable', yet all women that i have seen wearing them in reality, look frumpy. Not to mention ridiculous.
They have been 'in' for the last couple of years, and come in a wide range of styles, each one equally as ugly as the next. Not only is the jumpsuit design one that leaves a lot to be desired, they also come in a wide range of hideous prints.
I did not try the trend...gladly! Wasn't going to anyway...
8.Printed patterned pants.
Are something that should not exist. But apparently any kind of printed pants ranging from tight and floral, to baggy and stripped, are all good in 2010. I strongly disagree, and feel that many others will also!
Patterned pants delude the shape of the lower half of your body, usually making you look bigger than you are, and like a clown. Printed patterns have no business making their mark on pants, few people will entertained this trend, and hopefully it dies fast.
I have one, wore it once and never again...
9.Clogs.
They were ugly last time they were 'in', and their ugly now. What are they?? A shoe that can't decide whether it's a stiletto or a boot. Hey, they're probably a lot comfier than your 'normal' heels, but I'm guessing by the chunkiness they tend to posses, that they are heavy.
I took a pass at this trend too...
10.Parachute Pants. Personally i like these for lounging around the house in, but that is where they should stay! These pants are very comfy, but they should be classed more along the lines of pyjama pants, rather than a fashion statement.
There are variations of this pant that do actually look good, and are feasible for wearing in public, but that is with minimal bagginess, AKA, Genie pants. But minimal bagginess genie pants will tend to really only suit thin people.
I'm done hating, so my friend says she lives vicariously through me, i sure do hope she means well. My bro call me "simba marara" lol,you do not want to know what that means, in light of that...here are my resolutions!
1. Stop being so moody, i wonder if i have any control over this but i'll try.
2. Break down some of the walls around my heart*ahem*
3. Go to church, its been a really long long while.
4. Be committed, to both things and people.
5. Be friendly, some say niko na sura ya ndimu(not mentioning any names)
6. Be slow to anger.
7. Speak my mind
8. Learn to say no
9. Not be too nice
10. Try not to be too picky.
As you can see , i don't have quit drinking and what not because i'm trying to be realistic here.
Before i forget, Santa i have been a good girl this year, "all i ask for is true love"
Romeo ft. Justin Beiber- Mistletoe.
If you can't find that for me though, uh...the perfume provocative woman by Elizabeth Arden will suffice.
Xoxo...
